Greece-d Lightning

Am I on a ship or a speedboat?

They say that time flies by when you are having fun. No one ever told me that Father Time ran track in college…. that guy is entirely too fast.

Today is July 19^th, 2010. I have been on this trip for 37 days. Slow down there, time!

Stephen’s Seriously Stacked Shipboard Stats:
-Countries: 5

-Cities: 14

-Friends: 100’s

-Euros: Too Many

-Gyros: 2

-Pyros: 3

-Cairo: I’ll be there soon!

-Liver Transplants: 5

-Stomach Aches: hah.

-Gelato: GelatWOAH.

-Magnums (they are ice cream bars. Get out of the gutter): 5

-Minutes: 525.600

-Pictures Taken: lots.

-Videos Taken: lots.

-Cameras Broken: 1

-Cameras Remaining: 1

-Time it has taken me to make this terrible list: 10 minutes

-Time I will spend on this list from right… now: 0 minutes

-Time I spent thinking about continuing this list after the last point: 1 minute

So, word around the grapevine is that you want to hear about my time in Greece. I can sum up my trip in Greece in a few words, listed chronologically and each one followed by a rather lengthy and boring explanation that is completely unnecessary, yet you still have to read it because you have no choice and it’s the only way to get out. Out of where? If you don’t know, its too late already. You ready? Put on your ponchos!

• Gyros: I ate a few too many, they are delicious!
• Souvlaki: Greek food is awesome.
• Parties: I was on Ios for 3 days and two nights. As much as I would like to tell you all about my time in Ios step by step, inch by inch, I can’t. That is all going in my personal journal. This blog is rated PG. Sorry kids! Go eat some Fruit Loops and drink Sunny Delight.
• Ouzo: Greek people love their Ouzo (on the rocks, please!). It is meant to be a social drink that gives you a good buzz, but you can rely on Americans to mess it up and drink it straight out of the bottle. America! The red, white, and the blue!
• *Athens, The Acropolis, the Parthenon, and the Pantheon: While Greece seemed to be one giant party, I did do some touristy things on the first day. Gale, Colin and myself took a train from Piraeus to Athens on day one and we went to the Acropolis. It was pretty cool, although I was turned off by all of the construction equipment and the renovations going on. I definitely liked ancient Rome more. Another thing I noticed- Athens is a bit dirty, and it is a huge city. HUGE! The view from the Acropolis was amazing, and we had a good time. That night we went back to the ship and went out in Piraeus for the rest of the evening.
• VIP Tables: The first night in Greece, we traveled to the outskirts of Piraeus and went to club Sheesha. Turns out it was a celebrity party, so we got a VIP table and had a blast. If you want to know more, read my personal journal or ask gossip girl.
• Ferry rides: Oh, ferry rides. The morning after Club Sheesha, I had a ferry to catch to Ios at 6am. People in Europe party until about 7am, so I didn’t sleep at all. It was a rough walk to the ferry and I almost missed it. To make matters worse, my stomach decided it was angry towards the end of the ferry ride so I had to use the W.C… when I came out of the restroom the ferry was leaving Ios on its way to Santorini. Woops! At least I got more time to sleep on the way back from Santorini to Ios and I can officially say I have been to Santorini. I finally made it to Ios 3 hours later and found the gang.
• Broken Toes: Paul broke his toe at our junky hotel in Ios because the bed’s foundation was built into the floor and he decided to kick the bed just to make sure it was sturdy enough for him and Mike.
• Green Lasers!?!?! Don’t ask. Not yet, at least. Mike and I were stalked by creepy green lasers one night in Ios and it scared the life out of both of us. The Greek aliens tried to get us. Either that or it was the green lantern making sure we were okay.
• Australians/Norwegians/Brits… they are everywhere. Ios must have been full of 80% tourists and 20% locals. It was like spring break on speed. Paul and I met this one Norwegian guy Erich who was really cool despite being a chronic drunken liar. Best lies from Erich: South Carolina is his favorite NHL team (we definitely don’t have an NHL team. Sorry stingrays.), and he was drafted in the 10^th round of the NHL draft in Norway (according to Paul there is no 10^th round in the draft). Woooooo Norway! He is also apparently the son of a billionaire, he was in the army, he has multiple girlfriends, and he got into Harvard but decided not to go.
• Golden Pita: Only the greatest street side Gyro vendor in Ios. Three words: A Maz Ing. (ß I just did that.)
• Train rides: Public transportation (aka trains) in Greece is actually really simple and really cheap. 3 euros for 24 hours! We took trains everywhere (other than the islands).
• Flea Markets! Athens had crazy flea markets.
• Headphones! After a long, strenuous search for headphones, I finally found some in the Athens flea markets. WOOOOOOHOOOOOOO for music!
• Speaking of Music: House music. It is everywhere in Europe. At first I was not a fan, but now I love it. House music is awesome for parties, and I danced my nights and days away to house music in Ios.
• Nausea! The ferry rides were terrible. I fell asleep in the bathroom for 2 hours on the way back, just waiting for chuck to come up. Thankfully, he never came.
• Beaches: The beaches in Ios were  pretty and they were funzies as well.
• Goldfish! I can’t remember when, but I came back to the ship one night and at my last huge bag of goldfish from Costco. As delicious as they were, and as much as they smiled back before I bit their heads off, they made me feel pretty sick.
• Nutelleria! There was a place in Ios called Nutelleria Creperie that was all nutella. It was amazing, and it was the best way ever to get a sugar hangover.
• ATV’s: did I ride on one? Did I rent one? Does ATV stand for all terrain vehicle or All Three Virgins? You may never know. Regardless of what it stands for, they were everywhere and they were crazy.
• Trees? I climbed up more trees in Greece than in any other country, and my arms have the battle scars to prove it.
• Donkeys! Paul and I wanted to rent a donkey in Ios, but we couldn’t find a place to do it. We saw a guy riding a donkey through the streets and Paul tried to talk to him/take a picture with him but he shooed Paul away.
• Dancing: House music. What whatttttttt?!
• The Gazi Strip: Gazi is a crazy strip of clubs and restaurants all around the Acropolis. I went there on my last night in Greece and got wild. It was a fun night, and I made a bunch of new SaS friends.
• Wet Hot American Summer: I watched this movie last night with a bunch of friends. What a ridiculous movie. If you haven’t seen it, watch it. If you have seen it, go to summer camp.
• Oscar the Grouch: I bought a bright orange Oscar the Grouch shirt in Athens, and I am wearing it right now. Just thought you should know. I looked everywhere for a genuine European banana hammock but I couldn’t find one, so I bought this shirt instead.

So, ladies, gents, and other things, that is it for Greece. Sorry this entry is so succinct, but Greece was 99.9% partying and food. If you want to know more about what I actually did (the other 25 percent- I am a math expert), go to Ios and do it yourself. Or make out a donation to the “Help Stephen Survive IBS in the Mediterranean” charity and deposit it directly in my bank account. You will get a letter confirming your adoption of a manatee, a thank you note, a banana, and a copy of my personal journal telling you all about the stuff that goes beyond my blog’s PG rating.

For now I need to go do some research on what to do in Turkey. I will be there tomorrow! Much love people, be swell!

~Stephen

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